Survivor angst?

14 12 2009

This weekend marks an anniversary of sorts. December 12th 2008 was the day I started Temozolomide (chemo) treatment for a recurrent brain tumor.  After years of MRIs showing nothing, I was told in July ’08 that something was starting to show up.  In December ’08, there was now inflammation in the brain where the tumor was growing and my doctors wanted to do surgery — I bargained for the chemo option and started 12/12/08.  However, after six months of chemo and no improvement in my MRIs, I asked to stop.  Two months off chemo, the “tumor” regressed.  I explained to my doctor I was transitioning to a vegan diet and just finished one month of daily green smoothies.  My doctor looked at me as if looking at a space alien.  Two months later, the MRI came back as “interval decrease” which the doctor interpreted as “ongoing regression”.  I explained that I was following a vegan diet with green smoothies every other day, if not daily.  My doctor was intrigued and expressed interest in reading “The China Study”.  I’m continuing on a 95-99.8% vegan diet with green smoothies a few times a weeks.  My energy is increasing and I’m feeling healthy, but I’m also feeling what I’m calling survivor angst:

1) I feel the need to really kick my health into the highest gear possible.  After 9 months of feeling like crap, I’m ready to take full advantage of my improving good health.  I’m looking for a goal to accomplish to prove to myself I’m reaching peak health.  I’m kicking around a two year goal: marathon,  ironman, strongmans, or what?

2) I feel the need to get the word out that a vegan diet is a significant tool which can help reverse cancer.  I’ll continue writing this blog, and I’m planning on getting a “certificate in plant based nutrition” from Cornell University, but I feel the need to do something more, much more. Do I write a book?  Do I create a video blog?  Do I run around the US interviewing vegans who reversed their cancers?  Do I run around the US interviewing successful athletes who are vegan?  Do I get a PhD and do research in nutrition?  Do I purchase a ‘roach coach’, drive around and serve vegan meals to whomever wants it?

3) I feel the need to strengthen and solidify my vegan cooking skills.   I need to take more cooking classes — it’s as simple as that.  I’d really like to learn how to make raw vegan dishes as well as live food.

I’m a bubbling mixture of angst, and the holidays are magnifying my situation.  I’m leaving all this out in the open, tossing it into the capable hands of the universe.  …but I want to put this question out to you: where do you think all of this will lead me?  Place your bets now.

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6 responses

14 12 2009
KRISTEN'S RAW

Awesome! Yay for eating vegan and taking your health to improved and amazing levels! I love The China Study, and I adore green smoothies!!!!

Congratulations!
Kristen

16 12 2009
anticancerliving

Thanks

17 12 2009
Ronny

I write down my goals in a 2010 goals booklet. It is always in my wallet and I review it regularly. It keeps me focused on what really matters to me.

Enjoy and share,
Ronny

17 12 2009
anticancerliving

That’s a cool idea! Thanks

17 12 2009
Elle

I share your enthusiam for wanting to get the word out about our new found knowledge. People need to know that they can heal themselves and stop this horrible epidemic of cancer killing everyone if they only stopped eating the mass produced foods that our food supply is riddled with. Since becoming awakened to Gerson Therapy and eating raw and msg free, etc…. I too want to go back to school so I can help others. I feel like we need to get the word out. People know, but not enough of them. Why can’t this be mainstream knowledge. I have heard so many stories of people reversing their cancer via nutrition. It doesn’t have to be a secret. You are awesome. Stay positive and remember you CAN heal yourself by removing chemicals from your body. It makes perfect sense. The chemicals in our food supply is what is killing us. It’s common sense.

18 12 2009
anticancerliving

According to ‘The China Study’ animal proteins are the “toxic chemicals”. As a biologist (B.A.), I suspect the body suppresses the immune system in order to process meat and dairy since those animal proteins look exactly like the proteins in our body. We have the ability to eat meat/dairy as a survival mechanism only, this isn’t nature’s preferred diet for us.

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