Exercising My Power of Psychoneuroimmuniology

24 05 2010

If you’ve been following this blog, you’ll know that I was scheduled for brain surgery on 5/21.  However, the neurosurgeon called in sick just as I was being prepped for surgery at 6am.  At the time of this blog entry, I don’t know when it will be rescheduled as his assistant was also on vacation for the day.

(5/26 update: surgery rescheduled for 6/2)

I started to have panic attacks after not sleeping deeply due to the steroids.  My doctor prescribed sleeping pills which I resisted taking, opting instead to lower my night time dose of the steroid.  However, I’m taking the sleeping pills now — and an additional anti-anxiety pill in the afternoon just to get me though to surgery.

Until I actually go into surgery, I’m exploring how to exercise my power of psychoneuroimmuniology.  It’s simple, right?  Fear vs love.  Perceptions of fear lowers our immune response and perceptions of love enhances our immune response.  It’s our body’s perceptions, correct or not, that regulates our immune system.  However, these perceptions of love and fear are mostly part of our habitual mind (aka subconscious).  The habitual mind is just running a recording, like learning to drive.  Once you know how to drive a stick shift, you don’t have to think about it again and can focus your conscious mind on something else while you drive.  To make things even more difficult, the conscious mind and habitual mind work very well independently so as not to drive you crazy.

So then how do I tap into my habitual mind to promote deep feelings of love?  Where do I start?  Considering I spent the last year doing daily positive affirmation work, you’d  think there wouldn’t be anything left — but I have to approach this from a “beginner’s mind”.   I decided to “go within” and meditate on it.

Time dilated.  I must have need to just relax and mediate — without being on any anxiety drugs.  I was going deep.  “You’re not what you do.  You’re not what you own.”  Then a flash off light.  My mom took my picture while I meditated.  How annoying!  I went back to the guest bedroom to escape my singular paparazzi.  All I could do was laugh.  I went back to finish my meditation and remembered how a co-worker teased me about going to lunch at Fat Burger and reveling in the greasy meatiness.  Both him and I had a great laugh — but my next thought was how long it’s been since I’d laughed like that,  not for several weeks at least.  Since then, not for several weeks until today.  I think I had my answer: “Enjoy all the humor around you“.




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